meritocracy | ♛accidential video;

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♛accidential video;

[the feed blurs in, shaky and uncertain. there's grass, sky, and there's blood. there's golden curls and a familiar brown headband and there's blood.

the video screen is smeared with red fingerprints and there is suddenly white skin, spasming fingers reaching for the screen but there is not a single word. not a single sound.

it moves, slowly, the fingers twitching as if in agony before it moves to a face, blood smeared at the top of the chin, dirt speckled across the cheeks and eyes barely open. for a minute there's the flash of a horrible red, gaping wound beneath the chin but then it's back to a pale face, lips parting but no sigh coming out. then the video spirals upwards, once, twice, red fingerprints and all.

and the fallen woman hasn't uttered a single word. ]

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[What is this image, Nephry was looking through her journal for-

Oh.

Oh no.]

Natalia?

[This is not good.] Natalia, where are you?

[silence.

it's silence and birds and earth.

there's no sounds.

it's frustrating, but that's how it is.
i'm sorry nephryimsorry--]

[That? Does not look good. And he can hear the rage and threats of revenge already formulating in his mind, even knowing after four years of experience how futile it is. Asch is already out the door, speaking to the journal even as he drags on a cloak to fend off the cold - and to have something to give her when he finds her. Because he is going to find her, one way or another. He'll tear the entire damned village apart if he has to.

First things first, though-]

Natalia- I'm coming. Try to stay awake.

[He's angry. He's livid. But he is going to stay as calm as humanly possible until she's safe.

The violence can come later, if need be.]

[She is three centimeters from dropping everything she is doing and going to look for her. But she needs some direction.]

Can you show me what you see?

[she can hear asch's voice. that's good. he's still here--..selfish but so much relief. her lips twitch even as her head lolls into the grass. my friend, it's thought wistfully even as her eyelids flicker open once, then close.

asch is asking something of her but it's not even something she can give and she's sorry. it's just silence and birds chirping on her end. and blood, always blood.]

[silence. and then--the video picks up grass, dirt, crackling noises.

there's sky and there's trees around. it'a forested area. then the video shakes and drops back to a sharpening rush of green grass]

It'll be all right, Natalia. Try to stay awake, and don't move.

[it's just silence. it's really irritating.]

[Damn. Damn, damn, damn. Lack of response means she's either too weak or too wounded to do so.

He refuses to accept the possibility of the alternative.

Sheer force of will is probably what gets him there, stumbling upon her in the dark; his foot hits the journal before he sees her, and he's on his knees at once. He brushes her hair back, cursing quietly under his breath, barely, just barely keeping his rage restrained. He could hyperresonate this entire goddamn clearing with barely a thought.

He presses two fingers against the side of her neck, gently, above where the blood is. ...Still beating.

Okay, so destroying the village is out. Good to know.]

Natalia, I'm here. Are you awake?

[Careful, careful. He needs to do something about that wound.]

[it's his voice again. he's around isn't he? sometimes she wondered when she was there if she had dreamed it all up. asch, luke, ion..everyone together again. it had been a strange and lovely dream--

that hurts.

as he touches her neck it's a vague tap, almost like a drop of water in the sea of numbness she's in. until her neck flares up like fire, aching and slow as the wound drips into the grass.

i'm hardly dressed right..that's not..good--sorry--

her green eyes lift to his out of focus, before they clear, then lid halfmast. she tries to form the words but her throat and lips won't move, and it's embarassing--it's frustrating and there is a ball of helplessness curling in her stomach but it's asch and she promised to try for him. to smile and show happier things.

so instead natalia smiles apologetically with blood smeared across the lower part of her face. you found me.]

[Idiot, he wants to say. It's on his lips and he's cursing himself a little bit for it, dragging the cloak off his shoulders and draping it over her body. There's something wrong with her throat, something that goes deeper than the wound itself. If she can't even make a sound it means there's damage that he can't repair.

Worse than Guy's injury just the other day, then. What the hell are the Malnosso doing out there?

No time for deliberating the issue now; if he can't heal her completely, he can at least seal the wound enough to take her home. Tear can do the rest, she's a much more advanced healer than he is. He lifts a hand to her neck, the soft light of his 7th fonons flickering into view, winding gently around the wound. Stop bleeding. Stop bleeding. Heal. Heal her...

He hates this- seeing her in this state. It takes every ounce of his concentration to focus on healing, healing and not the destruction he'd love to rain down on his enemies by what he sees. Damn them to hell.

It shouldn't have been her.]

[she can feel cloth on her body but that's it, and it's silence and grass and asch. and the slow trickle in her throat, in her mouth--she doesn't cry though. maybe it's because she's cried enough and she doesn't have anymore or maybe it's because she can already see him start to unravel a little and it hurts.

i want him to smile--i want to make him smile, not make him sad. not like this--asch--asch i'm sorry.

as the seventh fonons begin to show themselves natalia's smile, that had been a flickering candle, ghosts over her white mouth briefly, something like pride in her eyes. he had always been so capable. that's something..she'll have to mention to him once she can get her words back.

i don't know if i ever told you what a capable person you were. it's no wonder i relied on you so much? did i ever tell you that before asch? both you and luke-..did i ever tell either of you that?

it's black ghosting over her vision and everything beneath her hips feels numb and dead and she's floating in the black. her entire throat, her chin--it's all red. she must look a terror. that's hardly seemly for a Princess..

but the deep line in the center of her throat, with it's sprinkling of lines seems to twitch at the fonons. the skin slides closed like pieces of cheap tape. it won't hold forever. but she isn't seeping out everywhere. the trickling is inside but it's not out.

good. maybe she won't get so much on his clothes--he'll have to carry her. her legs aren't working either. that's strange..]

[Asch has already answered by the time Tear is ready to voice a response of her own, leading her to simply grind her teeth in what is inevitably frustration. It was just like when she had last been with the Malnosso, and to think that just days ago she was helping them –

No, her thoughts of disgust had no place here, all that mattered was that she keep her mind clear as much as possible as she readies herself for what would likely be Asch calling her for help, already stepping out the door to watch for the pair with her journal open in hand. She had to keep Natalia awake, she just had to...] Natalia? Are you still there?

[Please answer, just please let this be something she can fix. If she had made the wrong decision just now to wait for them rather than risk just missing them in the village, she wouldn't be able to forgive herself.]

[Nephry hears Asch, and then Tear, talking to her, and decides to add something then.]

He'll find you. Don't worry.

[A lot of worrying is already going on.]

[Tear. It's Tear. Natalia's eyes flicker open again, blurrily. It feels like a few days ago she had been crying on her shoulder--how long was that?

Is she alright? She can do little else but blink into the screen and muster the same strained, white smile. It looks as much as a sorry as it is a quiet, weak hello. There's blood caked to her hair and her face but that smile is what stands out.

Tear I look absolutely horrible, don't I..a bloody Princess--how humiliating. Didn't I say once we'd go shopping----..too pretty to wear soldier clothes all the time--

[she wonders if she can see the sorry look on her face if she focuses hard enough. but the focus is flitting away. ]

...Idiot. [He can't help it. She's acting like a fool, worrying so much about keeping a smile on her face. One thing he's grateful for, though, is that it at least is keeping her awake. Passing out would be merciful, but at the same time he's concerned about the potential consequences. There's no way to know how hurt she is until they get a doctor or a real healer to look at her.

Once the wound is healed enough to seem like he could move her, he releases the arte, retrieving the journal and setting it on her lap - perhaps the voices will help to keep her awake - before sliding his arms underneath her, very carefully supporting her head to prevent the wound from reopening. He rises to his feet, bringing her up with him, and cradles her as close as he dares without aggravating her wounds, letting the cloak and his own body do the work of keeping her warm. The last thing she needs is to get sick on top of everything else.]

This won't take long.

[It's quiet, barely a murmur, half to himself. They're on their way, they're moving; he's going to get her some help. If he was a better healer, if his fonons weren't already so decimated by his lack of time, maybe he could-

...but those kinds of regrets are worthless, aren't they? Ultimately, they do nothing for him. He can curse how pathetic he is all he wants but it won't get her home any faster.]

[Never mind that he's at the apartment recovering from his own Malnosso-inflicted wounds. Never mind that he's already bandaged from elbow to shoulder and should probably not be moving.

When that video pops up on his journal, Guy's last thoughts are on his own set of injuries.]

Natalia...??

[Where was she, what--

...a quick glance showed Asch had already left a response, as well as Tear. So at least people who were able to get her some immediate care were aware and on the move. Still, Guy can't help but lift himself to his feet as he keeps talking, making his way to the apartment door.]

Natalia, can you hear me? Is someone there with you?

[If not, he wasn't about to hesitate wandering out to look for her himself, even if Asch was bound to beat him to it.

Ghhk. Damn these scientists.]

Edited 2012-05-10 03:13 (UTC)

[she wondered if he'd get around to calling her that. her lips twitch again, if she could laugh with the blood in her throat she would. but natalia lies like a broken doll on the ground; no sound--no words. no confident voices--no assurings that she's strong, she'll be alright--she's grown up, after all--nothing.

as he puts it in her lap she can hear the voices of their friends and her eyes mist over as her head sags into his chest. she's sleepy, asch. she's so sleepy. she's so tired..

nephry--i told you i was tired before--i think--i'm very tired now. i wonder if that is looking back also--to admit that much. i suppose some parts of me haven't changed..

as tear and nephry's voices sound across the video natalia's head lolls a little, the cloak is warm over her bloodied shift.

natalia quietly listens to asch with closed eyes, it's a single sentence but it says enough. her hand fumbles, twitches against the fabric of his clothes before her fingers grab footing and close around what she can grasp.

her eyes open briefly.

thank you, asch. it's alright.]

[That sight frightens her, and it nearly breaks her resolve to stay put because those scientists had no right to do this to her, not to her best friend. Despite all that she attempts a smile for her, able to tell just what it was that Natalia meant with it. Why was she apologizing for her appearance, when no matter what she was beautiful?]

It's all right... Asch is already on his way, isn't he? If you're worried we can clean you up afterward.

[Natalia doesn't speak. She can hear Guy and there's a stab of guilt. Guy sounds worried too--

Before I started that journey--I would have demanded him to come like a servant--I was cruel..--wasn't I..why am I thinking about this now?

Her chest feels warm even if it's cold, the blood, the grass--it all feels cold. Despite all her mistakes her friends were still here--she could still be here--even for a while.

Sadly she can't say these things. Instead it's only silence. ]

[Guy waits for a long, drawn out moment, his jaw tightening at the sounds of nothing but the wind, the grass... everything, it seemed, but her voice, or the voice of someone nearby....]

Natalia...

Natalia, if you can answer, please - let me know that you can hear me. Say something, do something. Anything.

...--

[She would swallow but it would hurt. She would nod but she would bleed. Instead Natalia just keeps smiling, blinking a few times as if that would continue to convey what she wanted.

I am worried--but not so much about that--..maybe once I might have more but..

But there are black spots and it's harder to focus.]

[there's pause, and there's a quiet tap. it's against the feed and it takes all her energy to raise her arm but it's something. she feebly does it again, lips pursed with frustration as she blinks furiously.

i'm sorry..]

[The noise, as quiet as it was, forces that pit from Guy's stomach, even more so as it is repeated. Alright... alright, so she was coherent, at least. He leans against the doorframe, a hand clenched to his arm, letting out that breath he wasn't quite aware he'd been holding.]

Stay awake, alright? Keep your eyes open - stay brave. You've got help on it's way.

[And whoever gets there first better make it there in good time. Until then, he's keeping the audio open, hearing the faint sounds of both Tear and Nephry speaking to her. Damn, he didn't want to just sit here and do nothing. But at least they could provide her company. That, in itself, was care. And it would have to do for now.]

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